When saying “Thank you” isn’t enough
https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/when-saying-thank-you-isnt-enough-jane-l-brown-esq-
How do you adequately thank someone who cares for you every day, all day?
My husband is my caregiver and words aren’t enough to express my gratitude. Even when he is at work he is on call, willing to run home to address my needs.
I seriously doubt that even his friends understand the stress he is under what with work, the financial strain, questions about the future, the sense of loss he feels, and the relentless work he does for me; I am the cause of it all.
As I write this I’m realizing that this is really about me and my feelings of guilt. I’ve said “I’m sorry” to him but that never feels right (after all, I didn’t cause it [MS] to happen).
So how do I adequately express myself when saying thank you is insufficient and saying I’m sorry is wrong? My feelings are messing things up. I said above that I am the cause of it all, and in a literal sense that is correct, but when it comes to thanking my husband I need to get outside myself ~ saying thank you IS enough. I truly mean it so it’s both heartfelt and appropriate; coupled with an “I love you” should make both of us feel better.
I’m hopeful I will come to realize how wrong I am. Time will tell.
Filed under: General Problems
My wonderful husband of forty years took care of me prior to my being sidelined by chronic pain but since then goes above and beyond the call of duty meeting my every need to the best of his ability while working shift work with 12 1/2 hour shifts. He not only does almost everything for me but also cutting,splitting and carrying fire wood, carrying jugs and buckets of water, keeping the fire going so that I have heat in the bitter Alaskan winter, cooking and serving my meals, carrying food and water to our horses, walking the dog in often subzero weather, making the long trip to town to buy groceries and run errands and go to doctor appointments with me, and is currently packing our household, quit his job and moving us several thousand miles from Alaska to southern Oregon so that I can have an easier life and not be confined to the cabin for most of the year. I feel like all the thank yous and I love yous in the universe will ever be enough! I am the luckiest of women to be loved so well!
Thank you for this. I could not agree more with what you have shared here. My wife has been my support over the past 5 years on all fronts and I thank her every single day.
On those days that my pain levels are managed enough to be able to get out of my lazyboy. I always show my gratitude for what she does for me by cooking her a very special meal. She enjoys this and actually boasts to her fellow employees that she has her own “Private Chef” at home. With my culinary background I often cook too much which gives her the opportunity to take leftovers to work as lunch.
My wife is a Casino restaurant manager and has shared some of my creations with the chefs there and they have all made very good comments about my food. This makes me feel good and I know that it makes her proud and I feel like less of a burden on her.
It’s the little things that can not only be good therapy for those of us who are in pain, but it’s also good therapy for them to show our significant others how much we appreciate them.
Thank you again for sharing.